Sunday, 25 March 2012

Sunshine Sunday

I went to my first BBQ of the year this afternoon.  It was lovely.  Good food, Good Wine and I have to say Good Company because they are family haha.  No, it was a really nice few hours.  The kids were with daddy and they turned up later on causing mayhem.

I have had a really quiet weekend.  It was well needed.  My stress levels have been through the roof these past few weeks mainly due to one naughty little boy.  Anyway I had a little break and he stayed over at his dads last night.  Faye didn't but apart from her constant chattering she is a good girl. I had a total of 30, Charlie free, hours and I can feel my blood pressure has returned to normal.

I'm certain that since Charlie was ill he has been possessed by the devil.  It has been one constant kick off, over everything and anything.  I finally flipped. There is so much a person can stand and on Saturday that line was crossed. The good thing is he has returned home a little angel, so far! I am under no illusion that it will last.

It's lovely just to have some me time.  To sit in the garden reading my book in the sunshine, with no interruptions.  No fighting, arguing, no constant shouts of "mummy, mummy".  I would soon be bored if I didn't have them, but I certainly appreciate my time off.  I have been totally selfish and very self indulgent and I can now face the week ahead.

Tuesday, 20 March 2012

Parents Evening and big decisions to be made!

I've been to see my little girls teacher tonight and she is doing brilliantly at school.  She is definitely taking after her mummy as she is doing exceptionally well in with her writing.  Yeah, another budding writer in the family.  Mind you, I could have told them that. She has a little note book and is always scribbling away. 

Needless to say I am one very happy mummy.  The ex turned up and to be fair didn't say a lot.  He sat there looking not to pretty and contributed nothing.  I maybe shouldn't complain at least the effort was made.  hmmm!

Moving swiftly onto the bad things the teacher had to say, which were that Faye has not been herself these past couple of weeks.  Now I have actually had battles with her phantom tummy aches and not wanting to go to school. Granted she has been ill recently and I had thought that maybe she was playing on that, for a bit of extra sympathy .It is like over night she turned from an angel to a devil,  her behaviour has been awful,  she's had strops and thrown things around, been cheeky and generally is not her happy little self.  Working out the dates that this all started, it has coincided with her first sleep over at daddies.

It is obviously not working and has unsettled her.  My dilemma is, what do I do next?  I can see the battle lines been drawn yet again, but as a mother I will not have my kids upset.  We had a good old chat tonight and it breaks my heart when she says she can't concentrate at school because she is thinking about whether to do the right thing or not. "I can't get it out of my head mummy," were her words. "All I can think about is do I sleep but I don't really want to because it's scary."

She is six years old for crying out loud she shouldn't be having to deal with this.  I will make the decision for her.  There are no more sleep overs for the foreseeable future and until I have sought further advice on this matter.  What kind of a mother would I be if I allowed this to continue?

Monday, 19 March 2012

Don't leave kisses on my texts!!

I'm not sure if it is just me, but does anybody else think that it's weird if your ex, yes your ex, leaves not one kiss but two, on a text message?

To cut a long story short we had been liaising via text with regards times for the parents evening at my daughters school tomorrow.  You can imagine my shock when the words.  "I'll see you there x x" appeared on my screen.  "What the fu**, you cheeky bar steward" (that's the tame version) I shouted at my phone.  Not that he could hear, but it made me feel better.

99% of the time we barely say a civil word to each other, apart from when he is after something or up to something and wants to get in my good books.  I can only assume that he has forgotten who was texting, which to be fair I think I am more insulted about.

It will be fun tomorrow night when we have to spend at least 10 to 15 minutes together in the same room.  Let the fireworks begin!

Wednesday, 14 March 2012

Yeah, I have a Desk!

Well after yesterdays post I stood gazing around my dining room mentally planning where I could put a slightly bigger cage for my piggies, when my brain started to go into over-drive. I could move that there, and that there and I could buy a desk and put that there.  Before I knew what had happened impulsive me had arrived and taken over. I was clicking buttons on the website and hey presto one desk and chair ready to collect.  Quick phonecall to the parents and they kindly agreed to be my delivery men.


Last night I excitedly ripped open the boxes, pulled out the clear as mud instructions and set about putting together my new furniture.  That's when the headache started.  Putting the furniture together was a piece of cake getting it to fit into the planned space was another matter.  In all my excitement I had made a boobie and mis-measured.  Result, my small desk, was actually huge! Shit, Shit, Shit. 

That is my problem, I never take a step back and mull things over.  I just dive straight in there.  I want it, and I want it now.  Usually this ends in me having a major panic attack because I've not thought things through properly but hey, it's all good fun and I always manage to solve my disasters.

 I have spent all this evening re-arranging furniture, moving book cases and tables from one side of the room to the other, only to put it all back again.  Eventually I have managed it, I knew I would, and I now have a desk to sit and work from instead of the dining table.  I love it, love it, love it.

And, my little ladies and very happy snuggled up in there lovely new rather large home. 


Tuesday, 13 March 2012

Spoilt Little Piggies!

As well as having two children to look after, I also have to beautiful little guinea pigs.  My ladies as they are affectionately known are currently sulking with me.  They are probably two of the most spoilt piggies around. They live indoors in my dining room and cost me an absolute fortune in cucumber.  They currently munch their way through at least one a day; plus on my shopping list are carrots, cabbage, curly kale and broccoli.  I often find myself having to make special trips to the shops because I've run out of a specific vegetable they like.

They demand attention everytime I walk past their cage and love nothing better than a snuggle.  Lily loves to lay in Faye's arms like a baby.  I mean what kind of a piggie is she?


The reason they are sulking is that I accidentally manged to drop their cage when I was cleaning it out, resulting in a rather large crack right across the bottom of it. Now, rather than rush straight out and buy a new one I remembered I had a spare in the loft.  It's slightly smaller than their original and rather then wire is has a plastic top.  Well, quite frankly, they hate it! 


Since they have moved in, all they have done it fight with each other and squeak rather loudly at me.  They are definitely letting me know exactly what they feel about their new home. When they are not squeaking they sit looking at me with little miserable faces.  Yes, I know that sounds crazy.  How does a piggy have a miserable face?  Well, they can.  You can see it in their eyes.   I guess come payday the first item on my list will be a new home for my babies.

Sunday, 11 March 2012

Would you lie to your Kids?

The ex and I have been dealing with issues regarding the kids sleeping at his house.  To cut a long story short its been tried before and didn't work.  Faye is a home- bird and a mummies girl.She isn't  keen on sleeping out, anywhere! 

After discussions with her, she had decided that maybe she may like to give it another go.  Now the  agreed time was Friday night, just gone.  The ex suggested, why don't we not tell her she's sleeping out? I'll pick her up from her dance class and just keep her for the night. Or, we could just tell her that this is how it is going to be, end of. You have gotta be joking! I shouted not quite so politely.

That would make me a liar.  The one thing I have always always told my children is that I would be 100% honest with them and never make them do anything that they didn't want to do.  I have never lied to my kids.  Throughout the whole separation and ongoing divorce we have had open discussions and any questions have been answered totally honestly.  Obviously she has received a version suitable for a 6 year old.

I'm proud of the fact that throughout the whole mess, my kids have stayed stable, well-balance and happy.  They have adapted to the changes, they continue to do brilliantly at school and nothing and I mean nothing is going to come in and change that.

It is always me that picks Faye up from dance class so can you imagine what would go through her mind if out of the blue her daddy turned up, took her to his house and told her in no uncertain terms that she was sleeping.  It could  cause no end of damage.  She is a very sensitive, yet very mature little girl and it doesn't take much, for her to be deeply upset.  What would she think of me? I would have allowed that to happen to her.


My view is that children need to know what is happening and why.  She didn't choose to be in this situation and much as he despises me for my tough line when it comes to the children what I do is for their sakes. 

Have you ever lied to your children?

Saturday, 10 March 2012

Fever again!

My kids go to their dads on a Saturday and Sunday, every other weekend.  This weekend being their turn to go I was looking forward to a few hours peace and quiet to really get some work done.  It's hard trying to get anything done on a night anymore.  There are getting older and don't want to go to bed so early.  I'm now lucky if they are in bed for 8.30pm and by that time I'm tired, having been up and on the go since 6.30am, my concentration isn't what it could be.

Although they visit at the moment they don't sleep over.  Faye did sleep over last night and it seemed to go ok.  As soon as she is poorly he couldn't get her back home quick enough.

Typically this is now the second weekend out of three that one or both have been poorly and therefore wanted to stay at home with mummy.  As much as I love them to pieces, they sure know how to pick their times.  My assignment has been half finished for six weeks now and at the rate we are going it will be in the same sorry state for the foreseeable future.  It's so frustrating at times! 

Must be nice to pick and choose when you have the kids and then only get to do the good bits.  I'm praying they are both better tomorrow so I can have a bit of me time without having to answer to their constant demands of  drinks, snacks, changing DVDs and wiping a constant stream of running noses.

I can't remember the last time I had a full nights sleep, let alone a lie in.  What's one of them?  Even on a weekend when I refuse to get out of bed until at least 7, I'm still generally woken up.  At the moment I have my baby Charlie with a thick green snotty nose laid on one sofa and my Princess sprawled on the other and we are watching 'The Polar Express' for the umpteenth time.  I really don't want a Christmas film on at Easter but it's Charlie's film of the moment.  And if it keeps them quiet for half an hour it's worth it.

Friday, 9 March 2012

I managed to get a good sleep last night, but I'm feeling even more exhausted today.  Guess this lack of sleep catches up with you. At least Charlie is on the mend. After the stressful day yesterday I went to bed early and actually nodded off whilst reading my book, only to wake up at 11.30pm to what I thought was Charlie crying.  I went dashing through to his bedroom only to find him fast asleep and snoring. Not only does he invade my waking hours he's obviously now invading my dreams.

I'm missing my little princess tonight.  She has decided to sleep at her dads for the first time since last summer and I know that I won't get much sleep tonight.  I'll be fretting over if she's alright.  Knowing what she is like she's all talk, but when it comes down to it, I know she won't settle well.   It's so strange having one of them here and one not.  There's no fighting, no arguing and no screaming.  It's far to quiet and not right.  Roll on tomorrow.  Let the arguments begin!

Thursday, 8 March 2012

Fever!

Oh what a horrible day! I have been up since 3 am, in fact prior to that I managed 2 hours interrupted sleep, so really, I have been up all last night and spent all of today nursing a poorly little boy.  At the worst point this afternoon his temperature reached 39.9oc and was pretty scary.  The house was like a fridge, there's been no heating on, a fan blasting out cold air and doors wide open.  Despite the layers I kept adding I felt frozen solid while he continued to get hotter. Luckily, I have managed to get it right down in the last couple of hours.  He is now tucked up in bed, dosed up with Calpol. Hopefully, if he can have a good nights sleep he will be much better in the morning.

Even at the tender age of 3 there is no mistaking the fact that he is a male.  He has driven me virtually insane today.  He has felt so sorry for himself, and my god, has he milked it for all it's worth. He can't stand up cos his legs hurt.  His eyes are stinging. He can't hold his juice because his arms hurt and the list goes on and on.  He has been waited on hand and foot and enjoyed every minute.

He had nodded off at one point so I settled myself on the sofa with my book, and a very large strong coffee.  I hadn't read a page before he woke up.  " Mummy, I need a wee". Up I get, sort the potty and settle him back in his spot with his blanket.  Sit myself back down, open my book and, "Mummy, I want a DVD on," up I get again.  10 minutes later "I need a drink," followed by "I don't want to watch this now, I want this on." Arrrgggghhhhh!

An hour later, my coffee was cold and the book, well that's not gonna happen.  Everytime I picked it up he said, "Hug me mummy," I'd reach across with one arm and continue reading.  "No mummy, hug me with two arms." What can I do but put the book down and give him a hug,  Before I know he is sat on my knee with his hair ticking my nose and my arms locked in place around him.  He swiftly nods off and snores whilst I'm left sweltering under the heat and hardly daring breathe in case I wake him up. 

Thursday, 1 March 2012

Cheerleaders

Faye is having a Cheerleader faze at the moment and she is driving me crazy.  First she puts on the outfit, a little red and white skirt and T-Shirt, which is really cute, and then she picks up the pompoms.  That is when the headache starts.



I'm trying to cook the tea, Now I have to admit I'm not the best in the kitchen  I get by but that is as far as it goes.  I don't enjoying cooking one little bit.  Right, so there's various pans bubbling away and stuff under the grill that I'm trying not to burn and in dances Faye.

"Oh yeah, mummy.  Your cooking the tea, mummy. Cos your the best, mummy.  Oh yeah, oh yeah." she sings at the top of her voice.
"ohh lovely" I say. Rustle rustle of the pompoms followed by a huge star jump, which resulted in one of the pompoms nearly ending up the pan of the spaghetti. 
"Oooooohhhhh yeeeeeaaaahhhhh, muuuuummmmmy.  Oh, ah.  Your cooking the tea, mummy.  Cos your cooking is great, mummmmy."  side step right, side step left, rustle, rustle.
"Hmmmm, very good, sweetie, now go practise in the living room".
Rustle, rustle, swish.  The pompom hits me in the face as I bend to check the garlic bread.
 "Faye!"
"oh, yeah, mummy.  We're having spag bol, mummy.  oooohhhhhh. eeeeeeeee. With garlic bread, mummy. Gimme a......."
"Faaaayyyyye! Enough, please.  I'm trying to cook tea."


My ears were nearly bleeding.  With the rustle and swish of the pompoms she skips into the living and promptly sings, "ooohhhh Charlie, ooohhhh Charlie."
"Faye!" screams Charlie "I can't hear the tele, mummy tell Faye."

Needless to say it all ended in a big fight with Charlie trying to wrestle Faye to the ground and Faye whacking him in the face with the dratted pompoms.  I'm thinking I may need to find that big pair of sharp scissors ...