Sunday, 29 July 2012

Sunday Night Blues

I cannot believe that the weekend is over so soon.  I have been looking forward to this weekend for a while.  The kids were going away with daddy for a few nights giving me a much needed 3 night / 3 day break.  Needless to say I had all sorts planned and there was so much that I was going to achieve but as with best made plans it has all gone a little bit wrong.

I have to admit I have had some really nice rest and relaxation.  Friday saw me out for lunch with my mum and sister.  I cannot remember the last time I spent a Friday afternoon in a beer garden relaxing with a nice glass of wine.  Then Saturday was barbecue time, which was delicious, and all washed down with more wine.

Saturday night I was suppose to be going out for a few more drinks which I had been really looking forward to.  It's not often I get the chance to go out on a Saturday night anymore.  Hair and make up were done to perfection, 5 inch heels and dress and I was good to go.  I had just got in the car when my mobile rang.  My little lady was very upset, crying in her bed and wanted to come home as she was missing her mummy.  What else could I do but collect her and bring her home.

Thankfully the night wasn't a complete write off but it wasn't exactly as planned.  Still I can't complain.

Both kids were suppose to be at their dad's today until about 4,30. I did have plans to really get cracking with my assignment that has been sitting sadly, half finished, on my desks for the best part of six weeks. However, he decided that there was a change of plan and he brought a very tired and whingy little boy home at 10am.  Yeah thanks, so he has had the nice times and tired the kids out leaving me to deal with two over-tired kids whinging, fighting and generally being bigger pains in the bum then normal all day.

They are both now tucked up in bed after an  early bath and that's it weekend over.  I am now in a bad mood. I am not looking forward to going to work in the morning and I have just had a falling out with someone over the stupidest thing ever. Not the best end to an otherwise really good weekend.



Monday, 23 July 2012

100 shades of me

Everybody that knows me, knows how temperamental, difficult, stubborn and stroppy I am.  They know exactly to handle the mood swings and inevitably run for cover and leave me alone until the mood as fizzled out and died. Mostly ignoring anything I say or do.  I then call them up, right as rain, as if nothing has happened.  It's just accepted and a long standing family joke.  I have always been the same.  I don't expect I will ever change and to be honest if I did then I wouldn't be me anymore.

I have recently been getting to know someone and we have been chatting and texting a fair bit.  I have always maintained that I am difficult and to be honest I know that I am a nightmare.  I don't thing they really took me that seriously. So imagine there reaction when they are subjected to a strop and a mood for the first time.  It has not been a pretty few days.

I have been thinking a lot about the fairly complex person that is me.  In fact, I think I am going to write a book and call it 100 shades of me.  I would love to be one of those people that is always happy and the same level headed person day in, day out.  The fact is I could not be more different.  I never know what type of mood I will wake up in and it only takes the littlest thing to go wrong in the day to change the mood from the happy me to being totally evil.

On the bad side of me there is the moody, stroppy, stubborn me but then I can flip in a matter of seconds and revert to being happy, laughing, loving and caring. The only way to deal with the bad side is to let it run it's course, not take me to seriously and wait for the demons to disappear. 

I am very much my own person and I am fiercely independent.  I don't take kindly to being told what to do and the more people push me, the more I will dig my heels in and do the exact opposite.  I honestly don't know how I will ever handle being in a full time relationship again,  These last couple of years I haven't had to think about anyone but me and the kids.  I have actually probably been in some ways the happiest I have been for a while and I was being true to myself and doing what I wanted to do with me life.

This may sound a bit strange but the majority of the time I actually enjoy being on my own. I do like being single.  I'm not a people person.  I like nothing better then to get the kids to bed, turn off the TV and just have some quiet me time.  A time where I don't have to talk to anyone.  I can be totally selfish and do exactly as I please.

All I can say is the next couple of months may be interesting, if not a little stressful.  I can see emotions running high and turmoil may be heading my way. 





Sunday, 15 July 2012

Hit by a Truck

It's 8.30pm and I have finally sat down,  I feel like I have been hit by truck and I am almost to tired for words.  This week has been totally insane and I have not had a minute to myself. If I had one wish it would have to be for more hours in a day,  There simply aren't enough.  What I wouldn't give just to sleep in until midday tomorrow, get up and lounge around in my PJs and spend the day doing absolutely nothing.  The reality is I will be up at 6.30am making pack lunches, doing school runs, heading off to work and to make matters worse I am going out tomorrow night, so it will be another late one.

The kids are suppose to go to their dads on alternate weekends, this weekend being his turn to have them and my turn to have a little 'me' time.  However, it was Faye's big dance extravaganza last night, which has resulted in him actually seeing very little of them and me, once again, having to do the lion's share of the work.  The next free time that I will have is a mere 13 days away. 

Getting back to the dance show.  I was the proudest mum there.  It was the first time that she has danced on a 'proper stage' and she just glowed all the way through.  She had the biggest beaming smile plastered to her face and she loved every single second.  All the hard work that has gone into the show really paid off because I had a fantastic night.  I cannot wait to buy the DVD to be able to
re-watch it.

It was one very tired little girl I had this morning.  All the excitement and late nights have caught up with her.  She was at dance rehearsals from 5.30pm until 8pm on Friday night.  She was at the Venue for 4pm yesterday for more pre-show rehearsals, before the performance which ran from 7pm to 9pm.

Her dad was picking her up at 9.30am this morning to take her for the day but she had a tummy ache and got all weepy and refused to go with him.  The reality of it was that she wanted a bit a mummy time.  Charlie went with his dad and my princess stayed with me.  We had a good day rummaging around a car boot sale with her nanna and grandad.  She was in her element and came away with a few little bargains that she managed to sniff out.

 

Thursday, 12 July 2012

Clever little Kids

I have to have a little boast and say that I have one proud mummy today.  I have two amazingly, wonderful, clever kids.  Yes, I am very biased but I have good reason.

Firstly, I have received Faye's end of year school report and it is full of praise.  She is working at the top end of the levels expected, for her age, in all subjects.  What more can I ask from her?  I am so so proud of her.  I know that she works really hard and I can feel a few treats heading her way.

There was a closing comment from here class teacher this year which put a huge smile of my face.  He teacher said " Faye has been a pleasure to teach.  She is a very capable girl who can be relied upon to produce a high standard of work.  She is thoughtful and well-mannered member of the class and is understandably popular with all in the class.  she always behaves to a high standard.  She has a fantastic smile that will be missed."  What a fantastic thing to be told about your child. 

Then this morning, I had a visit from the health visitor to assess Charlie.  Baring in mind that they haven't seen him since he was 6 months old and he is almost four.  She stayed all of 5 minutes.  He chattered her head off as soon as she walked in the door, proceeded to swing off the slide like a monkey, drove his bike into her legs and pelted the football at her.  Her words were, "I don't think I need to get my tests out of my bag.  I can see that he is very advanced for his age and they would be a breeze for him.  He is a normal, happy, active child  I'll write my report and him sign him off."  Fabulous stuff Charlie.  Treats will be heading your way to.

Before she left she asked me if I had any concerns or worried with him.  My only question was where is the off switch?  To which, she had no answer. Guess I'll have to continue tiring him out the best I can.

Sunday, 8 July 2012

Wallowing in mud!

With an unexpected day of sunshine yesterday we headed out for a day out at the farm.  Packing a healthy picnic, the kids happily put on their wellies and were soon off wallowing in the mud.  Yes, all he rain had left some parts a little water logged and in typical kids style they soon found out the best places to splash.

We had a great day feeding the animals and fish.  Even charlie very bravely decided to have a go at feeding a goat.  He's not very brave when it comes to touching the animals. He likes to look from a distance.  The slightest baa, moo and neigh has he running for cover.  In fact, when the horse let out a rather loud neigh, he almost fell off the hay bale he was standing on, and ran for cover.

It was two very dirty but happy and tired little children that returned home last night.  We had only got 2 minutes from the farm before they were both snoring in the back of the car.  Unfortunately, that left them still running around at gone nine o'clock last night. At least I had my Saturday night glass of wine to help me block out their screams

Friday, 6 July 2012

Everyone knows that Faye is a proper girlie girl.  She adores anything pink, glittery or sparkly.  She loves nothing more then to get dressed up in one of her numerous princess dresses, complete with shoes, jewels and handbags. Parade around the house playing the part of lady muck and taking afternoon tea from her pink plastic champagne flutes.  Just like her mother I may hear some say.

You can imagine my shock when returning from shopping yesterday Faye fell in love with the police dress up set I had bought for Charlie.  She couldn't wait to try on the bright yellow tabard, grab the walkie talkie and trungeon, clip on the handcuffs and slip on the hat.  Poor Charlie hardly got a look in.  He was the bad guy that was constantly sat in the jail whilst Faye did, what she does best and, bossed everyone about.

"Please, please, please, can I have a dress up set like this mummy?" she begged last night.  So, daft as I am, I went off in the pouring rain this morning to purchase a set.  To cut a long story short the shop I had bought the outfit from had sold out and I have spent most of my day traipsing around, getting soggier and soggier, trying to find a replica.  The things mum do!

Anyway, job done I have now bought a second outfit and as you can see she is pleased as punch.  Needless to say tonight I have found both kids handcuffed to various pieces of furniture around the house including the hallway banister, the radiators and surprise, surprise come bedtime their beds. They actually cried when I unclipped them both and told them it was bedtime. 
"But we want to sleep together like this mummy" they moaned.  Hmm, tempting to leave you chained to the bed kids but no sorry I can't.
"Why can't we? Why? Why? Why?" they demanded. 
"I think if I left you like this kids a real policman might come and take mummy away in handcuffs" I explained.
"That's ok" they replied.  Yeah, cheers kids.  At least I know where I stand in the grand scheme of things

Tuesday, 3 July 2012

Never ending Divorce.

As I opened the door tonight I spotted the large while envelope on the doormat with my solicitors name stamped all over it.  Finally, I thought excitedly ripping it open.  Hoping against hope that this was confirmation that the decree nisi had been pronounced.

Dear Mrs Baker .... We regret to inform you, blah, blah,blah..  I threw the envelope down and proceeding to mutter numerous obscenities whilst turning on the oven and sorting the kids tea.  There is nothing like slamming a few cupboard doors to make you feel so much better.

In a nut shell, I sent of my application form to the court 10 weeks ago.  The documentation I received today was the original application form returned to me.  The solicitor had made a mistake on the form and the judge has rejected it.  For gods sake.  It has taken 10 weeks to return it.  So now I have to re-sign and re-submit so hopefully in another 10 weeks probably around the middle of September I may have confirmation.  Then I will be able to apply for decree absolute which takes a further 6 weeks and a day.  At the rate I am going I will be lucky to be divorced by Christmas.

At the same time as sending off the form I begrudgingly confirmed to my solicitor that, 'yes, I would be prepared to attend family mediation with Mr Baker to discuss financial matters as per his request.'  The letter today now informs me that Mr Baker does not now wish to attend these sessions.  Her suggestion to me is that I reply to Mr B's solicitor asking that he attends the sessions with me.!!!! Now, I am starting to get really annoyed with this.  I have last count of the number of times that I have agreed to request this.  It must be at least 4 if not 5.  Each time the letter they draw up and send out is costing me money and each time I get the same answer.  NO.  Therefore I can calling an end to all this mediation.  That's it!

So, where do I go from here.  Well, firstly I have to re-sign the form and get that submitted and secondly, I have absolutely no fricking idea.  Guess I'll sit back and wait for my rather useless solicitor to be in touch.